


Taking A Bull By the Horns

by Lucewriter



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, Happy Ending, Seduction, Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2020-03-19
Packaged: 2020-09-26 15:08:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20391700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucewriter/pseuds/Lucewriter
Summary: The Might Nein is camping and Jester awakens in the middle of the night to find Fjord gone. Caduceus and Beau say that he's bathing in the nearby lake. Jester gets caught up in the idea of a very naked Fjord being oh so close. She's been thinking about him for a while, and the Tusk Love books have her curious and amorous. Deciding to take the bull by the horns, Jester heads off to seduce her half-orc crush.**Takes place sometime before they meet the bright queen, while still in the empire**





	1. Chapter 1

Jester wasn’t sure what woke her. The cool breeze that wafted over the camp or the popping of a log on the fire. A shiver ran down her spine. Her eyes popped open and thank the Traveller for dark-vision. She could make out Beau sitting next to Caduceus, they seemed to be keeping a silent watch tonight. Sometimes she liked to stay up and listen to the others when they spoke. She couldn’t always hear them but when she could everyone talked about all kinds of interesting things. When she lived with her Mama she liked to pretend she was a spy, eavesdropping on secrets of the government. 

Scanning the makeshift camp she saw the others were asleep. Except for Fjord? Sitting up, she saw that his bedroll was empty. Sleepily getting to her feet, Jester stretched and walked over to the two on watch. 

“Hey, guys. Anything going on?” she asked, her voice hushed in the darkness. 

Caduceus slowly looked at her, a wide smile on his face. “Nope. All is quiet.”

“It’s pretty boring, actually,” Beau added. 

“Have you seen Fjord?” she asked, trying to sound super casual like she didn’t really care at all. 

Beau smiled though, so maybe she wasn’t as good at being super casual as she thought. 

“He went over to the river. Said he was gonna splash some water on his face.” Beau waggled her eyebrows, pointing towards the woods. “I bet he could use some help washing his back.” 

“But, he’s washing his face?” Caduceus asked, confused. 

“I mean not that I care  _ at all _ but maybe he needs a towel or something.” Jester grabbed her towel cause maybe he needed another one. 

“Go get um tiger!” Beau whisper shouted. 

“Now there are tigers?” Caduceus shook his head, a bemused smile on his face. 

Practically skipping towards the river, Jester skidded to a stop as she heard a splash of water. Her cheeks heated. What if he was  _ naked?  _ She’d seen _ plenty  _ of naked men, it would be totally not a big deal. 

Super DUPER casually, Jester walked forward and peeked around a tree. 

The slope of a smooth back met her gaze, muscles sweeping into the top curve of a butt cut off by the water. Before she even realized it, a little squeak escaped her. 

Fjord whipped around, eyes wide. Blue light swirled in his hand but when he saw her it fizzled out. 

“Jester?” Confusion was replaced with embarrassment and he covered his nethers with his hands. But she was super interested in his chest. Cause he was shirtless and while there were little scars all over his torso. There were also very interesting nipples peeking out. 

Of course, she’s seen him shirtless before — when they all went to the bathhouse — but this felt different. Taboo and romantic. 

On the other hand, Fjord did not look like he felt the amorous tension. 

“What are you doing here?” he asked. But she must have taken too long to answer cause he frowned then noticed where she was staring. At his nipples. 

“Jester!” he snapped and used one hand to cover his junk — still hidden by the water dammit — and the other to cover his chest. 

“Sorry sorry!” Slapping her hands over her eyes, she made it look like she wasn’t looking but was totally peeking through a tiny gap she made. “Beau said you were over here and I wanted to make sure everything was okay. Why the heck are you bathing at like 3am?”   


“I was working on some spells and got sweaty. Figured I’d wash it off.” A pause and then, “anyway, I’m fine. You can go now.” 

Part of her agreed that it was time to leave. On the other hand, this might be her only chance to convince him that they were  _ meant  _ to be together. Fjord had been pushing her off again and again but now was the time! There was even a scene just like this in Tusk Love! Oskar was bathing and Elizabeth caught him and it ends in a wild embrace of passion. 

“Maybe...maybe I could help wash your back?” Jester said. Dammit! That wasn’t sexy at all. “Or your dick!” OH NO. It just came out of her mouth. 

His entire face went slack, every drop of blood seeming to drain from it. Then it all appeared to rush back in an instant, turning his light green skin a deep olive. “I—” He coughed into his hand, voice sounding strangled. “I think that would be a bad idea. You should go back to camp.”   
“Well, I think it would be a great idea! I mean I think you’re hot and I think you like me too. So why not?” Realizing she was still covering her eyes — not seductive at all! — she dropped them, crossing her arms instead. 

Even in the darkness, she could see Fjord’s eyes go to her chest and then skitter away. Why would he…? Only then did she notice that by crossing her arms she’s plumped up her boobs. Without the leather armor, she was only in her night shift, and with her arms pushing them up it made her own nipples peek out. 

“Listen, Jester, you’re really cute.”

“I am?!” Jester interrupted. He’d never said anything before. It didn’t seem possible but his face got even redder. 

“Yeah of course you are. You have really pretty eyes and that little button nose.” 

“And…?”

“And your…” His eyes flicked to her chest again.

“My boobs?” 

“What?” He stumbled back but seemed to forget he was ass deep in the water and tripped, dunking his body. 

If there was one thing her mama taught her it was to go after what she wanted. Decided, Jester yanked off her nightdress. By the time Fjord had reemerged sputtering, she was already tugging off her bloomers. 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

If it wasn’t for the icy cold river washing over him, Fjord could’ve sworn he was dreaming. One moment he was standing and Jester was standing not twenty feet from him on the riverbank, the next she was buck-ass naked. There was nothing inherently sexy about her nightdress, in all honesty, it almost looked like something a kid would wear. High-collar, long-sleeves and it reached her ankles. But then she plumped up her breasts as if presenting them to him.   
He’d always figured Jester had a thing for him, and it had gotten worse since she started reading those smut novels. But now it appeared it was something she was certainly going to act on.   
It wasn’t that he didn’t like Jester — he did, quite a lot — and it wasn’t that he didn’t think she was sexy — cause she definitely was. He just wasn’t sure she was ready for a sexual relationship and didn’t want to push her. Sure she grew up in a brothel, but she was also a virgin. At least he was pretty sure she was. And the worst thing was when coworkers slept together. What if he fucked up? If she grew to hate him? You can’t trust someone to have your back if they hate you. And it definitely would be him to fuck this whole thing up.   
They were all so far deep into this journey together, they needed each other. If his actions ruined their party they might have to split up. This was the closest thing to a family he’d ever had. He couldn’t ruin something so great, even if he thought Jester one of the best things that ever happened to him.   
“Dammit, Jester, if we do anything it may end up hurting us. The team. All of it.”   
But she didn’t seem to be listening. Instead, she slowly made her way into the water. Her tail swished back and forth and he was mesmerized by the sight.   
Her mom called her Sapphire and gods damn he could see it then. Cerulean skin turned pearlescent in the moonlight, she looked like a some fae demon here to tempt him to another plane. Her high, pert breasts swung with each step and he was helpless not to watch her. The slight swell of her stomach dipped swept out into thick hips he knew he could grab onto.   
The tiny metal trinkets on her horns tinkled as she stepped into the water. But then she started blinking rapidly.   
“Holy shit, it’s really cold!” Her voice went so high-pitched Fjord had to rub his ears.   
Of course, that made him take his hands off his crotch area.   
A little huff of breath came from Jester. Looking at her, he realized his error. Her eyes were glued to his penis. It was dark but she had darkvision.   
“Jester! Dammit! Go back to camp!” He deserved a sainthood after this. A temple built to his fuckin’ honor. She was standing there, looking beautiful and sexy and maybe just like everything he ever wanted in his life and he had to turn her down.   
But it was for the team. Jester was just infatuated because he was the only viable guy on the team. Caleb was a mess, Caduceus was probably asexual (or maybe he actually asexually reproduced??). Hell, if Mollymauk was still alive she’d probably be more interested in him.   
And why did that sit like tar in his stomach?  
“Why? I want to have sex with you! Isn’t that obvious?” Jester threw her hands into the air.   
Despite the very cold water, his dick thought this was a grand idea.   
Dammit! “Cause if we have a thing it’ll fuck up the dynamic of the team! And I value your friendship too much to fuck it up.”   
Crossing her arms, she got a mulish look on her face.   
Fine! If she wouldn’t leave, he would.   
Giving her a wide berth, Fjord made his way out of the water, making sure to cover his genitals. Yet, he could feel the little blue devil’s eyes on him the entire way.   
“I’m not giving up, Fjord! Imma get your dick!”   
Grabbing his clothes, Fjord ran bare ass naked into the woods. But a very large part of him wanted to turn right around and give her what she wanted. The very idea made his dick jump.   
Out of the darkness, came a large pink form.  
“Caduceus,” Fjord said, confused. “Aren’t you supposed to be on watch?”   
“Yeap. Got worried ‘bout you two.”  
“Uh, well...all good.”  
“You probably will wanna put on some pants. Beau is in a bad mood for some reason. She didn’t want me to come after you.”   
Beau was probably conspiring with Jester to begin with.   
Maybe it was time to have a conversation with Jester. At least one where they both weren’t naked.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some mild spoilers in regards to Avantika and Nott's past.

Chap 3  
“I don’t understand why he won’t have sex with me!” Jester shouted then clamped a hand over her mouth. Beau and her were about fifty feet behind the others, taking up the rear of the group as they made their way down the road.   
The lot of them looked back.   
“Did you say something?” Nott called   
“Nooooo!” Jester yelled back, fairly sure she was blushing by now.   
“Well,” Beau said next to her. “He said it was cause he didn’t wanna ruin the group dynamic, right?”   
“Yeah,” Jester said, kicking a pebble. The rock rocketed towards the rest of the group and pinged Fjord right in the back of the head.   
“What the-?!” Fjord grabbed his head and turned.   
Jester probably should’ve acted casual, like it totally wasn’t her! But she was just so shocked she’d hit him.   
“It was an accident! I swear!”  
A green glower was her answer as if Fjord didn’t quite believe her.   
“Oh come on! You know I’m not dexterous enough to hit you with a pebble on purpose!”  
“Yeah,” Beau piped in. “That was actually pretty cool.”   
“Well…” Fjord trailed off, his face all grumpy and adorable. “Just don’t start punishing me just cause I said no.”   
Nott glanced at him. “What did you say no to?”   
Even with the distance between them, Jester could see Fjord’s face go red until his olive skin.   
“Nothing. Forget it.” With that Fjord turned forward and put another ten feet between them.   
Well dammit, she was making a huge mess of this seduction thing. When her mama wanted to seduce a man all she had to do was get naked and BAM! Then everyone was naked. Maybe Jester just wasn’t as attractive as her mama?  
Or maybe she just needed to practice more.   
Nott came scurrying up to them, a sly look on her hawkish features. “Soooo what was that about?”   
“Jester is trying to seduce Fjord,” Beau said.   
“About damn time,” Nott said, hands on her hips. “I swear I’ve been watching you two circle each other for months.”   
“What?” Jester blinked. Had she been that obvious? Wait! If she was obvious then… “Fjord likes me?!”  
“Hush!” Beau slapped her back, which did nothing but make Jester squawk as she tried to regain her balance.   
“You ladies good back there?” Caduceus called to them.  
“Fine!” Beau called back, then turned to their smaller group. “Yeah, Jessy, he really likes you.”   
“But he slept with Avantika!” And while Jester tried to not let that sting, it still had her fuming sometimes. “I have been here the whole time and yet the first chance he gets he sleeps with someone else!”   
“Listen,” Beau said, a pinched look on her face. “When we first met you...you were pretty innocent.”   
“She still is,” Nott interjected.   
“I am not!”  
“No, I’m Nott.”   
“Ha ha very funny.” Jester glared at the goblin. Now was not the time for jokes! “I lived in a bordello! I am not innocent!”  
“Ummm,” Beau grimaced. “You were kept inside with no friends. I don’t mean innocent like...sexually innocent. But you don’t really have like, the interpersonal skills the rest of us have.”   
Jester wanted to argue but the words caught in her throat. Maybe she was a bit naive in comparison to everyone else. For so long her entire world was that one building. And she rarely spoke to anyone besides Mama.   
“You’re learning quickly,” Beau continued. “But I don’t blame Fjord for going slow and having sex with other people in the meantime.” She leveled a long look at Yasha who was at the front of their group, out of earshot. “Sometimes you have to let the other person come to you when they are ready. But that doesn’t mean you gotta be celibate and shit.”   
Even Jester knew that Beau had the hots for Yasha, but the barbarian woman seemed unfazed and it looked like Beau had dropped her pursuit for the moment.   
“But I came to Fjord! I was naked!” Jester said.   
“Really? Good for you!” Nott said, excited.   
“But he turned me away.” Jester couldn’t help the pout on her face.   
“So we need a plan,” Nott said. “You two need to talk, Jess, you need to get him to sit down, discuss what you both want from a relationship and see if it’ll work out.”  
“Or just bang his brains out. Corner him and tease him till he won’t wanna say no,” said Beau.   
“I like Beau’s plan better.”   
Nott cast them both a disgusted look. “I am married. Don’t you think I know how to best handle relationships?”   
“Well yeah but…”   
“But nothing!” Nott snapped. “Tonight, get him to talk to you alone. Say what you want and why and let him speak as well. Maybe you can get past any issues or maybe you need to drop the whole thing cause it won’t work.”   
“That’s boring,” Beau pouted.   
“Maybe I’ll go with Nott’s plan but he’s uncooperative I go with Beau’s plan.” That sounded perfectly reasonable!  
“Perfect,” Beau said. “We’ll get some time for you two alone tonight where you’re not on watch.”   
“All else fails,” Nott said. “Talk dirty. Men love that.”   
Well, she definitely knew dirty talk from listening in on customers. This should be easy peasy!  
Jester stared at Fjord, a wicked smile on her face. Just wait, Mr. Grumpy Orc. Tonight he would be hers.


End file.
